Ya ever stay home so much that you start thinking the characters on the TV shows you watch are your friends? Maybe it’s just me but I find this especially true with reality TV “families.” I can’t wait to turn on the TV to find out what Kim Khloe, and Kourtney are up to. I hate them and I am fascinated by them at the same time. I am entertained by their rich spoiled lifestyles and the stupid micro-problems that they whine about every week. How can anyone not be fascinated? They do what they want when they want and they think posing for pictures and owning a store that daddy bought them is work? I love when they moan about how “hard they work. It’s both hilarious and sad. If I saw them on the street I would say “Hi” to them and be shocked that they do not know who I am. I guess I can almost understand the crazy stalkers who are insulted when their obsession has no idea who they are. “Whatdayamean I don’t live in Mr Letterman’s house? I watch him every night. He knows me…I’m the one who….oh, never mind….”
During the warmer months I am never indoors. I rarely even watch TV during the summer. I am reading by the pool or on the beach and sometimes I am actually exercising. Not when the temperature drops below 50. I tend to hibernate. I find myself watching way too much TV especially the winter my husband was working out of town during the week. I had nothing to do at night so I channel surfed. This winter he was home but I was already addicted to TV. I have such a short attention span that I sometimes watch several shows at once. Every time a commercial comes on I flip to one of my other shows. I once watched a movie, two entertainment news shows and the weather channel (to see if it was snowing yet) for hours. I knew most of what was happening on all of the shows. I just kept finding new shows to surf and it continued until my brain completely melted into my popcorn bowl. I am either very sad, and pathetic or I am an awesome pop culture guru. I was actually quoting the people on these shows to my family and was surprised when they had no idea who I was talking about. Some people just don’t “keep up” with what’s important. What do you mean they turned off my cable because I haven’t paid the bill since October? I have been very busy planning Khloe’s wedding, because even though it happened over a year ago they keep showing the pre-wedding shows and I can re-live it over and over again.
The “Real” Housewives need me to attend their wine-filled catered affairs.….priorities, people….geeez!!! Those "housewives" are really fun to watch. They are so out of touch with reality and the lives of REAL housewives that the show is both annoying and hilarious and I can't look away. Would it be fun to have that much time to party and stress about every comment my "friends" make or would it just be an expensive version of Jerry Springer? If I had the privilege to be a "housewife" who did not have to go to work ( yeah, yeah, I know...all of you "stay at home" moms work so hard...but so do those of us who had to work when we had little ones. We had to juggle the mommy duties and the work duties so not matter how many nasty comments I get there is no way that staying home is as hard as being a working mom...yeah, I said it...) I don't think that I would dress up in full make-up, jewelry, and shoes every day if I didn't work. Real stay at home housewives wear yoga pants and flip flops,and eat Doritos outta the bag and then hide the bag in the bottom of the trash can so no one will know there had even been Doritos in the house...or maybe that's just me.
BUT I digress...I know that somehow my television families know I'm watching and they talk to me through the voices in my head so I am definitely not wasting my time delving into their exciting lives....holy crap what time is it? I think General Hospital is coming on and I promised Laura I would break up Luke and Tracy so when she comes out of her coma for good he will be waiting for her...now where did I hide the Doritos....
I am the guru…………
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